Some days I look at other people's blogs and see how much they just write… write about their thoughts and feelings. I wish I did that but then I think, I honestly don't have much to say. Haha. The things I think are things no one would care to hear about… things like…

I wish I was a background dancer/singer on Glee. It's a secret dream I have. I practice singing in my car…haha. Or I wish I could be on So You Think You Can Dance or American Idol. Dang want-to-be-famous dreams never coming true.

Not a day goes by that I don't say "I want a baby!" I think about having kids every day. I wonder what my sweet babies are going to look like. Will I be a good mom? I daydream about watching Jesse look at his newborn baby. Sometimes at night I pray that I will dream about our children. Jesse had a dream about our baby boy once and I was so jealous! I made him tell me every detail of the dream. My sister Tregani is the same way and has said that she is borderline obsessive…I'm the same. Why do I have to be so young and have so much schooling ahead of me? Patience Lysha, patience.

Something else I think about daily is when Jesse is actually in the Airforce and will have to go on deployments. Am I strong enough to be on my own, raising our kids, missing my husband for months at a time? It scares me. But then again, Jesse reminds me that this is his calling in life and that it will make our marriage and family stronger. When I am feeling doubtful, my dear husband is always there to remind me of the wonderful things that come with the Airforce. I sure am proud of him for choosing such an amazing career.

I miss my sister and her family a lot. Although they are only a few hours away, it's hard to be away from them for so long. It's going to be crazy when we all live all over the world! My favorite days are the days I get to FaceTime my sweet nieces and nephew. They are two crazy little girls but I couldn't love them more. Yesterday I was talking to McKinley and I said something like, "What kind of an aunt am I?" because I laughed at a picture she drew… haha… and you know what her response was? "You're a beautiful, nice aunt!" I think I'll keep her.

I think the biggest thing that consumes my thoughts is remembering how very blessed I am. I think I say that in every post, but it's true! The Lord shows me he loves me in so many different ways. I am surrounded by two amazing families, great friends, a wonderful job, good schooling, and most importantly, the man of my dreams. Literally. Jesse and I have our bad days, of course, but I am constantly reminded how lucky I am to have him in my life. I kind of love him a lot.


Anywho, although some things I write are silly little thoughts, I think it's important to write them down any way. I think I will enjoy looking back on the simple, little things in my life.

Comments

Jill Parsons said…
I love when you write your thoughts. It helps me get to know you more. Also, I wish I would have had a blog or wrote in a journal at your age. Some posterity down the line will love what you have written. I also love when you write because it reminds what an amazing person you are and that I get to have you in my life. Don't stop writing! Love you lysh
I need to do this more often. I just post about things we do not the little stuff. This was great Lysh! We love and miss you too. You are a nice, beautiful aunt!!
Tregani Lanham said…
The things you think are not silly my dear. I enjoy hearing what goes on in the mind of Alysha Lanham...Plus it makes me feel better knowing someone else is just as obsessed with their future babies as I am. I'm glad you shared...don't stop
Devri said…
I love that you share your thoughts and are open and honest with life. When people are like that, you feel like you can relate to them better plus you are a wonderful example with an amazing attitude! Keep it up! :-)
Teeny&Landon said…
I love this. I need to be better at sharing my thoughts haha
Gram said…
Love this post of your thoughts! It is nice to know what you are thinking. When you do have a baby and those children read your thoughts they will be so happy to know how you longed for them and you will be such a good Mother to them. You and Jesse will be great parents!